Invisible Man Quotes

Season 1
The Pilot
The Catevari
Ralph
Tiresias

“A schmuck named Nietzsche once wrote; ‘Anything done out of love, is beyond good and evil.’ Now, here’s the thing, I love my job. So what does that make me?”
Darien Fawkes (voice over) as he is breaking into a house, The Pilot

“See, my feeling always was good and evil could kiss my ass. But that night, well, they kind of got together and bit me on it.”
Darien Fawkes (voice over), The Pilot

“C’mon pops, earn your freakin’ Medicare!”
Darien Fawkes while giving CPR to old man who had a heart attack after walking in on Darien trying to blow open his safe, The Pilot

“Aw, crap.”
Darien Fawkes, first time heard, The Pilot

“You know how they say ‘No good deed goes unpunished.’? I was about to become the poster boy for that phrase.”
Darien Fawkes (voice over), The Pilot

Darien Fawkes (voice over): “Now, you have to understand something about justice in retirement communities. You even sneeze at an old person, you’re not gonna make bond. So, given my “crime” and that this was my third strike you can guess the outcome.”
Judge: “Death by lethal injection… sadly not being an option. It is the decision of this court that you, Darien Fawkes, be remanded to the maximum security penitentiary at Bakersfield. There to serve the remainder of your life without hope of parole.”
The Pilot

“Because of a bottleneck at the federal pen, they had to hold me a day at the court jail. Fortunately the security there was a little less than lax. Soon they’d be comparing me to the greats. Ed Coulters the Lizard, John Robbey the Cat, and from that night on I’d be Darien Fawkes the.. Aaah!”
Darien Fawkes (voice over) as he tries to pick the lock on his cell until a spider lands on his hand, The Pilot

“Yeah, they say when God wants to torture you he answer’s your prayers. Well, I prayed for a miracle, and for my sins, He sent it.”
Darien Fawkes (voice over), The Pilot

“He was a guy who saw a bright future in everything he touched. Lord knows what he was looking for in me.”
Darien Fawkes (voice over) talking about his brother Kevin, The Pilot

Kevin Fawkes: “You wanna tell me about it?”
Darien Fawkes: “Well, uh, you know we are still painting. And, oh God, wait til you see the living room. I think you, especially, are gonna love this. It’s got this really lovely colonial trim, it kinda.. No, no don’t. Don’t do that. Don’t give me the glare. I’m…”
Darien & Kevin: “Handling it.”
Darien Fawkes: “I am and my…”
Darien & Kevin: “Case is on appeal.”
Darien Fawkes: “Look, you wanna get your own sentences?”
Kevin Fawkes: “Then tell me one I haven’t heard before. Why the hell didn’t you call me?”
Darien Fawkes: “Yeah, and said what? ‘Hey bro! What’s happening man? Haven’t talked to you in a couple years could you come down and bust me out?’”
Kevin Fawkes: “Well, it beats hearing it over America Online.”
Darien Fawkes: “I’m on the web?”
Kevin Fawkes: “Darien!”
Darien Fawkes: “Wait a minute. I mean come on, you’ve been hogging the press since we were twelve. Don’t I get a shot?”
Kevin Fawkes: “No.”
Darien Fawkes: “No? No what? I’m not good enough?”
Kevin Fawkes: “You’re not guilty enough.”
Darien Fawkes: “OK Kev, if I didn’t do the crime, you think I can do the time?”
Kevin Fawkes: “Not where they’re sending you.”
The Pilot

Kevin Fawkes: “Look I can’t get into it here, suffice it to say it will involve some surgery.”
Darien Fawkes: “It sounded like you said ‘surgery’.
Kevin Fawkes: “It’s nothing I can’t reverse. Believe me it’s a small price to pay for getting out.”
Darien Fawkes: “Kev, I’m your brother OK? Not a lab rat.”
Kevin Fawkes: “Darien, we don’t have time for the pride thing.”
Darien Fawkes: “‘Pride thing’? OK, nice OK? You know this is my body we are talking about, now you wanna play doctor with it?”
Kevin Fawkes: “What? Would you rather your pen pals play something else? Look, I’m not saying it’s not a risk, but it’s better than throwing your life away. If you’re going to trust someone, trust me.”
Darien Fawkes: “Whys that? Cause you’re my brother?”
Kevin Fawkes: “Because you don’t have much choice.”
Said after Kevin gives Darien an option for freedom if he’ll agree to become a guinea pig for a government project, The Pilot

Darien: “Nice truck.”
Kevin: “I told you, it’s part of our cover.
Darien: “As what? An ad for welfare reform? Look, I’m just saying that whoever is funding this project…”
Kevin: “They’re people who want to make a difference, alright? They just…”
Darien: “Have to do it on a tight budget?”
The Pilot

Kevin Fawkes: “Welfare reform huh?”
Darien Fawkes: “It’s not bad. Actually, I think they have a nicer one at the Y”
Said as they walk through the government facility, The Pilot

Arnaud De Thiel: “It’s an honor to meet you Mr. Fawkes. I’ve read so much about you on America Online.”
Kevin Fawkes: “Arnaud has more degrees than the rest of us put together. We like to call him our Swiss Doogie Howser.”
Arnaud De Thiel: “It’s because they watch too much tv. I mean, next week I’ll be Xena: Warrior Princess.”
*Kevin and Arnaud laugh*
Darien Fawkes: “Oh, you uh, you must be the resident comedian.”
Arnaud De Thiel: Well, like I like to say, laughter is a man’s only real weapon.”
Darien Fawkes: “Cute, you make that one up?”
Arnaud De Thiel: “Afraid so. You like?”
Darien Fawkes: “Actually, I think it was funnier a hundred years ago when Mark Twain said it. You uh, gonna take credit for Huck Finn too?”
The Pilot

“Yeah, well, I guess you know, don’t believe everything you think.”
Darien Fawkes to Arnaud De Thiel, The Pilot

Darien Fawkes: “I even like Abba.”
Arnaud De Thiel: “Abba’s Swedish.”
Darien Fawkes: “No.”
Arnaud De Thiel: “Yes.”
Darien Fawkes: “No.”
Arnaud De Thiel: “Yes.”
Darien: No, no no no. I’m, I’m, I’m actually pretty sure they’re Swiss.”
Arnaud De Thiel: “They are Swedish. A Swiss man would never make lyrics like that. When I was in Zürich the whole university boycotted..”
Darien Fawkes: “Wait, wait wait. Time out. Zürich? You told Kevin that you were at Geneva.”
Arnaud De Thiel: “I have studied at so many places Monsieur.”
Darien Fawkes: “Yeah, I know, it’s just kind of tough keeping them all straight.”
Arnaud De Thiel: “Yes. Now I will always be straight with you Monsieur. The question is, will anybody else?”
The Pilot

“Time flies when you’re having fun, or in a coma. I’d been unconscious nearly three weeks, just enough time for every muscle in my body to go on strike. But even though it was nice to be up and around, there’s some days when you just shouldn’t get out of bed.”
Darien Fawkes (voice over), The Pilot

“My brother knew about me and spiders. He knew how I’d react. But only he knew what was coming next.”
Darien Fawkes (voice over), The Pilot

Kevin Fawkes: “Fear gets his adrenaline going, just like the spiders did to you. That jump starts the gland which then secretes the synthetic hormone I call quicksilver. You see? The quicksilver solidifies and it seals over the skin like Saran Wrap. You with me big guy?”
Darien Fawkes: “Saran Wrap?”
Kevin Fawkes: “Now think, the only reason we can see an object is because light reflects off it. You see me but not the wall behind me because the light hits my body first and then bounces back to your eyes. Now watch, watch! Watch what happens when an object is covered in quicksilver.”
*Kevin points to a lab rat which is quicksilvering*
Kevin Fawkes: “See? The quicksilver doesn’t reflect light, it bends it. The rat’s invisible not because we see through him, but because we see around him.”
The Pilot

“When the heart rate calms, the quicksilver dissolves and the subject’s visible again. This making sense yet?”
Kevin Fawkes to Darien Fawkes, The Pilot

Kevin Fawkes: “Alright, don’t look at me like that.”
Darien Fawkes: “Oh yeah, how am I supposed to look at you Kevin? Aw man, for crying out loud you could have told me what was going on.”
Kevin Fawkes “If I had would you have volunteered?”
Darien Fawkes: “Hell no!”
Kevin Fawkes: “Then how else was I supposed to get you out of jail?!”
Darien Fawkes: “The old fashioned way. Guns and explosions. Like, like, like Nicky the Alto’s brother.”
Kevin Fawkes: “I’m not Nicky the Alto’s brother, I’m yours.”
Darien Fawkes: “Then I guess you should’ve stayed out of it then huh? God! I do not need this Kevin.”
Kevin Fawkes: “What do you need Darien? You.. your street pals? You bookie? You’d rather go back to the pen?”
Darien Fawkes: “Hey! The pen I understand. You know, not this.”
Kevin Fawkes: “This is a chance to turn your life around, to do some good for a change.”
Darien Fawkes: “What the hell are you talking about?”
Kevin Fawkes: “read the papers Darien! We got terrorists planting pipe bombs in nurseries. Russian Mafia just sold nukes to Iraq. How long before one of these bastards gets a hold of a missile kit? Who we gonna turn to then? We need a solution. Imagine a corp of federal agents, each with a quicksilver gland. They could knock out these threats before they become lethal. Don’t you see? If we can perfect this we could save thousands, possibly millions of lives.”
Darien Fawkes: “Yeah, you know, uh they said that about a little appliance called the A-Bomb.”
Kevin Fawkes: “Oh it is hardly the same.”
Darien Fawkes: “Would you star sixty-nine reality man? OK Kev, like hypothetically OK? What happens when say, oh I don’t know Saddam Hussein gets his own little gland?”
Kevin Fawkes: “Let him try. The designs only on the base computer and up here.”
*Kevin points to his forehead*
Kevin Fawkes: “A criminal can’t get near them.”
Darien Fawkes: “Kevin? Hello!”
*Darien points to his own head, which is now housing the quicksilver gland*
Kevin Fawkes: “It is only for a couple of weeks! We test it, I take it out you’re free!”
Darien Fawkes: “And I’m telling you, get someone else.”
Kevin Fawkes: “I don’t trust it with anyone else. This is my baby Darien, it is everything I’ve worked for. You want it out I’ll take it out, but if you help me I know we can make it perfect.”
Darien Fawkes: “Kev, maybe it could be perfect. I can’t. You don’t know what I could do with this.”
Kevin Fawkes: “I’m willing to risk it, are you?”
The Pilot

“Because quicksilver doesn’t absorb light, we found the subjects surface area drops below freezing with consequent cooling effects on nearby objects. Call me crazy, but I think this just might have some very practical applications.”
Kevin Fawkes (voice over), The Pilot

“Rack’em up!”
Darien Fawkes to the Quicksilver Team after frosting beer mugs for them, The Pilot

Kevin Fawkes: “It’s a physical impossibility.
Darien Fawkes: “Just check it out.”
Kevin Fawkes: “You don’t think I understand how it works? It can’t be done.”
*Darien quicksilvers Kevin’s glasses on the table*
Darien Fawkes: “Bam! Boom! Boom! Boom! Who da man? Who da man? Who da man?”
Kevin Fawkes: “Despite previous tests subject exhibits ability to quicksilver outside objects for prolonged periods of time. OK we get it, can you bring them back now?”
The Pilot

Kevin Fawkes: “You gotta think about premature visibility.”
Darien Fawkes: “Premature visibility?”
Kevin Fawkes: “It can happen if you get distracted.”
Darien Fawkes: “Well then, we need to get some uglier nurses.”
Kevin Fawkes: “No. We need to teach you some control.”
The Pilot

“Now a yogi can control his blood flow with just the power of his mind. You can do the same with invisibility. Picture your heartbeat. Speed it up. Direct the quicksilver flow.”
Kevin Fawkes to Darien Fawkes, The Pilot

“You know they say good things come to those who wait. The bad things are always impatient.”
Darien Fawkes (voice over), The Pilot

“When I felt it the first time, I didn’t know what to think. I mean, it wasn’t a headache exactly.It was as if something was knocking at the back door of my brain. Something that wanted in real bad. Staring into that mirror, I had the sudden, horrible feeling that another person was looking back. A stranger who’d stolen my face.”
Darien Fawkes (voice over), The Pilot

“You know what? I’ve been pricked, I’ve been poked, and I’ve been prodded long enough. Now it’s your turn.”
Darien Fawkes to Kevin Fawkes, The Pilot

Darien Fawkes: “What happened?”
Kevin Fawkes: “I’m afraid we have a side-effect.”
Darien Fawkes: “Side-effect?”
Arnaud De Thiel: “Seems the quicksilver started acting as a cerebral disinhibitor.”
Darien Fawkes: “Wh..what is that?”
Kevin Fawkes: “A narcotic.”
Arnaud De Thiel: “And as near as we can tell, you were like a heroin addict in need of a fix. It broke down your higher cortical functions, released your darker inhibitions. As Freud would say, ‘it blew the lid off your id.’”
The Pilot

Kevin Fawkes: “Now don’t panic. Arnaud managed to come up with a counteragent that blocked the gland. It should hold you for a few days.”
Darien Fawkes: “A few days? You mean.. you mean I gotta get fixed up like every week?”
Kevin Fawkes: “For now. But it’s essential you go easy on the invisibility. The sooner you use the quicksilver, the sooner you could overdose again.”
Darien Fawkes: “So this thing’s turning me into some kind of junkie? Well, what the hell are we waiting for? Let’s take it out.”
Arnaud De Thiel: “Monsieur, really, you know, it’s not that simple. Your brother and I we have…”
Darien Fawkes: “Oh, so it’s not that simple? Uh, why don’t I make it simple for you, OK? You take it out.. or I bust..”
*Darien lunges for Arnaud
The Pilot

Kevin Fawkes: “Now you’ve got to understand. Your body has developed a chemical dependency on this. If we take out the gland now, it could be fatal.”
Darien Fawkes : “And if it stays in?”
Kevin Fawkes: “You’ll be alright.”
Darien Fawkes: “No, I’m not.. I’m not.. I’m not talking about me Kev. I mean don’t.. don’t you get it? I could have raped that woman. I could have killed you.”
Kevin Fawkes: “You are not going to kill anybody. Darien, please, trust me. I will take care of you.”
Darien Fawkes: “Yeah, you know what? I’d say you already did that.”
Kevin Fawkes: “Darien.”
Darien Fawkes: “Why don’t you get out, OK? I don’t need your help anymore Kevin. Not you, your pals and especially that Swiss Miss mother.”
Kevin Fawkes: “What? Arnaud? Arnaud saved your life.”
Darien Fawkes: “Oh God Kevin. Would you wake up? I mean don’t you think it’s a little strange how quick he came up with the counteragent?”
Kevin Fawkes: “Given his background? No.”
Darien Fawkes: “In Zürich?”
Kevin Fawkes: “Geneva.”
Darien Fawkes: “Geneva, Zürich, what do I know, right?”
The Pilot

“Well that’s the perfect ending to a perfect day.”
Darien Fawkes to Arnaud De Thiel sprays him with a fire extinguisher, The Pilot

Arnaud De Thiel: “Monsieur, you have me at a bit of a disadvantage.
Darien Fawkes: “No, I’d say I had you red-handed. Come on, you didn’t think you could fool me with that Swiss douche Doogie Howser act do you? Hey, a con knows a con.”
Arnaud De Thiel: “I think a con knows a good thing when he sees it.”
Darien Fawkes: “Like what?”
Arnaud De Thiel: “Like your salvation.”
*Arnaud holds up a computer chip*
Arnaud De Thiel: “This disk contains all the data on how to help me take the gland out of you. Your brother could have done it but he refused.”
Darien Fawkes: “Yeah, right. Cause it could be dangerous.”
Arnaud De Thiel: “To the gland you idiot. Open your eye! You know, you’ve seen the way he’s treated you. The way he’s used you like a lab rat. Your life, it’s a minor consideration to him.”
Darien Fawkes: “Oh yeah? And what is it to you?”
Arnaud De Thiel: “Many things. If we can just reach an understanding.”
The Pilot

“I’d say you’re about a bowel movement away from a whole lot of trouble mister.”
Darien Fawkes to Arnaud De Thiel after Arnaud swallows the computer chip containing the information for removing the gland, The Pilot

Darien Fawkes: “OK, come on. Come on, give me your best shot.”
*Arnaud holds the fire extinguisher he used to break a window over his head*
Arnaud De Thiel: “I just might.”
*Arnaud hits himself in the head with the fire extinguisher, knocking himself out and dropping the fire extinguisher which Darien catches as a security personnel comes in*
Darien Fawkes: “Aw, crap.”
The Pilot

Kevin Fawkes: “How am I supposed to believe this? You are accusing the nicest guy on my staff.”
Darien Fawkes: Oh Kevin, come on! Of course he’s nice! It’s the oldest con in the book. The old “I love Arnaud” scam.”
Kevin Fawkes: “How would you know?”
Darien Fawkes: “Because it’s what I’d have done. Kev, Kev, Kev come on. Come on, you’ve got to trust me on this one. Kev, come on!”
Kevin Fawkes: “Tell me one thing, this base has been on high alert since the project began. If Arnaud was stealing data, how the hell could he possibly get it out?”
The Pilot

Scientist: “What is it dude?”
Arnaud De Thiel: “Nine o’clock.”
*Arnaud throws a knife at the scientist he was just playing ping pong with, killing him*
The Pilot

Arnaud De Thiel: “This is Dr. De Thiel, code four! Code four! I need all security staff online!”
Security Personnel: “Calm down Dr. De Thiel. What seems to be the problem here?”
Arnaud De Thiel: “You know, it seems some joker put plastic explosives in your walkie-talkies.”
*Arnaud detonates the explosives*
The Pilot

“Honestly brother, you’d be late for your own funeral.”
Arnaud De Thiel to Huisclos, The Pilot

Kevin Fawkes: “Can’t let them get the project files.”
Staffer: “I’m trying to erase them now.”
*Kevin starts chopping the computers with an axe*
Staffer: “I got it! You’re the only other place they’re stored. Now go. Go!”
The Pilot

“Forgive me.”
Huisclos to the staffer hitting the computers with an axe before he shoots him, The Pilot

Kevin Fawkes: “It was my fault. It was all my fault.”
Darien Fawkes: “Next time you’re gonna trust me, right?”
Kevin Fawkes: “Yeah, next time I’ll..”
*a door opens to reveal a terrorist*
Kevin & Darien: “Aw, crap!”
The Pilot

“Gentlemen, we have an unforeseen problem.”
Arnaud De Thiel to the terrorists after finding out that Darien escaped, The Pilot

Kevin Fawkes: “Guns and explosions, like Nicky the Alto’s brother. I’m so sorry Darien.”
Darien Fawkes: “Look, it’s OK. I’m going to take care of you. I’m gonna take care of you OK? Here we go.”
Kevin Fawkes: “Get out of here.”
Darien Fawkes: “No, I’m not going anywhere.”
Kevin Fawkes: “Get out.”
Darien Fawkes: “I’m not going anywhere. Here we go, come on.”
Kevin Fawkes: “You don’t let them have what’s inside of you. You be smarter than them, OK? You were always smarter than me.”
Darien Fawkes: “Kevin, Kevin. Kevin? Kevin! Kevin!
The Pilot

“See you soon… Will you see me?”
Message to Arnaud from Darien written in blood on the t-shirt of the terrorist whose neck Darien snapped, The Pilot

“Madness building in my brain, attacking my sanity like clockwork. I knew going invisible just made it worse. Without the counteragent I only had days before the gland turned me back into a walking id. There was no choice, if I was going to get payback for Kevin, I had to get the last part of him out of me.”
Darien Fawkes (voice over), The Pilot

Eddie the Mammoth: “OK kid, I’m gonna take a whack at it.”
Darien Fawkes: “Wait, take a whack at it? I mean Eddie, come on this is my brain we’re talking about.”
Eddie the Mammoth: “Hey, hey, relax kid, it’s Eddie the Mammoth. I’m the one who took eight bullets out of Charlie Iellos hippocampus. How you feelin’ otherwise?”
Darien Fawkes: “Pretty good.”
Eddie the Mammoth: “You’re not drinking or anything? Your live is good, your kidneys are good?”
Darien Fawkes: “Oh, yeah it’s good.”
Eddie the Mammoth: “And you do have an organ donor card?”
Darien Fawkes: “Sure.. Why?”
Eddie the Mammoth: “You just stay right there, I gotta make a quick call.”
The Pilot

“No, I had to face facts. There was only one person I could look to now. And she was the last woman who’d want to see me.”
Darien Fawkes (voice over), The Pilot

Casey O’Claire: “So, what do you want to be when you grow up?”
Ten year old patient: “I wanna be a fireman.”
Casey O’Claire: “Really? Well, when I was little I wanted to be a rodeo clown, but my dad was really pushing biochemistry and my mom was in that whole 90′s neurophysics craze. So they kinda made me split the difference with this MD/PHD program at Hopkins. I said guys ‘I’m seventeen..’”
The Pilot

“They say memory’s a luxury only those who go straight can afford. But for Casey O’Claire, I’d always empty my pockets.”
Darien Fawkes (voice over), The Pilot

Casey O’Claire: “Come on Darien.”
Darien Fawkes: “What?”
Casey O’Claire: “You’re telling me someone micro-grafted a synthetic bio-partition into your cerebral cortex. Do you know how lame that sounds?”
Darien Fawkes: “Yeah, of course when you say it like that.”
The Pilot

Casey O’Claire: “Three hundred and sixty days I am falling in love with a total lie and that is not ‘technically a con’?”
Darien Fawkes: “No. No, a con is for profit, I did that because I…”
Casey O’Claire: “What?!”
Darien Fawkes: “I did it because.. Come on, Case.”
Casey O’Claire: “What do you want from me Darien? You say your brother did this to you, go to him.”
Darien Fawkes: “I can’t.”
Casey O’Claire: “Why? You break his heart too?”
Darien Fawkes: “No, I got him killed. You wanted the truth Case, he died in my arms.”
The Pilot

Darien Fawkes: “Look, I just.. I need you to get this thing out me.”
Casey O’Claire: “Yeah, but you haven’t even told me what ‘it’ is.”
Darien Fawkes: “No, no I can’t darling. I mean people are dieing over this thing, I can’t get you involved.”
Casey O’Claire: “And since when have you become Mr. Selfless?”
The Pilot

Darien Fawkes: “OK, OK look Case, I am.. I’m trying to get justice for Kevin OK? You know, you get involved I gotta get justice for you. You know, and then it just becomes this big thing you know?”
Casey O’Claire: “You just can’t stop can you?”
Darien Fawkes: “Stop what?”
Casey O’Claire: “Playing games.”
Darien Fawkes: “Case, I’m not playing.”
Casey O’Claire: “You are! And the stupidest thing is how badly I still want to believe you.”
Darien Fawkes: “Listen to me OK? I swear on my brother’s grave I’m not playing games with you.”
Casey O’Claire: “Then prove it.”
The Pilot

“All right, just.. You can’t tell anyone what you’re not gonna see.”
Darien Fawkes to Casey O’Claire right before he tries to demonstrate the gland to her, The Pilot

“It took all my will to put the demon back in it’s bottle. But even that couldn’t prepare me for what was coming next.”
Darien Fawkes (voice over), The Pilot

“I had no idea who they were, but I can tell you this much, their car was really cheap.”
Darien Fawkes (voice over) about The Agency agents who first took him to The Agency, The Pilot

The Official: “Good morning Mr. Fawkes”
Darien Fawkes: “Who the hell are you?”
Eberts: “Security prohibits him from giving his actual name Mr. Fawkes. For now you can simply call him ‘The Official’.”
Darien Fawkes: “The official what?”
Eberts: “Oh, don’t worry, you’re safe. You’re at The Agency.”
Darien Fawkes: “‘The Agency’?”
The Official: “We’re the guys who underwrote your brother’s project.”
Darien Fawkes: “CIA?”
The Official: “Not exactly.”
Darien Fawkes: “NSA?”
*The Official points to a sign behind him*
Darien Fawkes: “Department of Fish and Game? Aw, geez! You gotta be freakin’ kidding me!”
The Official: “No, they’re just our temporary sponsors. The Department of Defense had a few little cutbacks this year, but F & G had a surplus so, uh, we kind of got absorbed.”
The Pilot

Darien Fawkes: “Hey, wait, wait wait wait. How the hell’d you guys find me? What? Do you got like an Audubon Society spy satellite or something?”
The Official: “We staked out your girlfriends hospital, then we jumped you.”
Eberts: “One needs to be resourceful when one is underfunded.”
Darien Fawkes: “Yeah? Well I don’t appreciate being kidnapped.”
The Official: “No? Well, maybe you’ll appreciate this.”
*The Official hands Darien a photo from a security camera*
Darien Fawkes: “Arnaud. Hey! You got any more of these?”
The Pilot

Huisclos: “Anything, huh? Merde!”
Arnaud: Patience. It can’t stay in there forever.”
Huisclos: “It doesn’t have to. The auction’s in three days! What are you going to do? Are you going to walk in empty handed? ‘Oh, the disk is in here.’”
Arnaud: “My hands are never empty.”
Huisclos: “Oh, no, there’s too much blood on them.”
*Huisclos takes a swig from a Pepto Bismol bottle*
Arnaud: “Oh dear, have I aggravated your little ulcer.”
Huisclos: “You promised me Arnaud. You said after we finished this I could quit.”
Arnaud: “Did I?”
Huisclos: Dammit! Haven’t I done enough for you? Hmm?”
Arnaud: “No man can do enough for his brother.”
Huisclos: “You’re insane. Insane! I don;t know what’s going to cost you more in the end. Your arrogance or this irregularity.”
Arnaud: “Question my bowels all you like, Huisclos, but never, ever doubt my will.”
The Pilot

“Could you please stop shaking the mirror?!”
Arnaud to Huisclos as he performs surgery on himself, The Pilot

Dr. Ingrim: “It’s not my fault! You, your stomach acid must have corrupted it. Forgive me, but without that data there is nothing more that I can do.”
*Arnaud pulls out a switchblade*
Dr. Ingrim: “Unless I had, uh, Fawke’s original gland to work from.”
Huisclos: “Good luck finding him. He’s probably long gone by now.”
*Arnaud slashes Huisclos hand with the blade*
Arnaud: “We don’t need your attitude brother, we just need Darien Fawkes.”
The Pilot

Eberts: “We believe your Arnaud De Thiel may very well be Arnaud De Ferhn”
Darien Fawkes: “The phone?”
The Official: “DE FERHN! His nomme de guerre. It’s Swiss-German for Savage Alpine Wind.”
Eberts: “It also means hairdryer.”
The Official: Interpol calls him the Swiss bank of terrorism. He, uh, supplies other organizations with weapons, funds.”
Eberts: “Somehow he managed to infiltrate your brother’s team.”
The Official: “And that’s just the start. Word is eight terrorist groups just sent their buyers to his hacienda. Seems De Ferhn is having a little auction.”
Eberts: “Quicksilver to the highest bidder.”
The Official: “Invisible suicide bombers.”
Eberts: “See-through assassins.”
The Official: “Not a pretty picture.”
Darien Fawkes: “Yeah, well I didn’t draw it.”
The Official: “No, but you can erase it.”
Eberts: “You can steal the quicksilver formula back for us.”
Darien Fawkes: “Me? Well, what about the, the CIA or the NSA?”
Eberts: “You’re our best weapon, and.. Frankly this incident has been a bit embarrassing for The Agency. We prefer to keep it, uh..”
The Official: “Under the hoopa.”
Darien Fawkes: “You’re telling me the rest of the government doesn’t even know about this project? Aw geez.. So, so you screwed up and now I’m supposed to save your ass. You know what? I don’t think so.”
The Official: “Excuse me, but who’s the one with his brain turning to Alpo? You need the counteragent, we need the formula. You get’em back to us, with De Ferhn, we’ll get’cha back to normal.”
Darien Fawkes: “Let me ask you a question, why would you trust me? I, I could just make a deal with him.”
The Official: Yeah, sure you could. But, will he give you what you’re really looking for? Like, I don’t know, justice.”
Darien Fawkes: “That is a crock of blatant manipulation.”
The Official: “Yeah, but as crocks of blatant manipulation go, heh heh, it’s pretty good, heh heh.”
The Pilot

Bobby Hobbes: “Yeah, those were some days, man. When I was with the company.. You’re not interested in any of this?”
Darien Fawkes: “I don’t even know what the hell you’re talking about here. I mean, look in case you haven’t noticed, we have a bit of a terrorist problem on our hands here.”
Bobby Hobbes: “Yeah, who do you think uncovered it genius? Hmm? Folks have got the dirt bags swimming in here like flies. Even the cops have left. Everybody’s freakin’ paranoid. They whack you even if you sneeze like a government agent.”
Darien Fawkes: “Oh yeah? How come you’re still breathing?”
Bobby Hobbes: “‘Cause I’m too good for my own good. What? You don’t think? Why don’t you pull out your wallet? Go ahead, pull it out.”
*After Darien searches for his wallet Bobby pulls it out of his jacket and hands it to him*
Darien Fawkes: “Hobbes, my dog can pick a pocket, OK?”
Bobby Hobbes: “Yeah? Can your dog make out a terrorist?”
The Pilot

“Nobody makes Bobby Hobbes.”
Bobby Hobbes to Darien Fawkes, The Pilot

Bobby Hobbes: “What the hell makes you so special? I have been out here year after year, day after day, busting my butt! Oh crap.”
Darien Fawkes: “What?”
Bobby Hobbes: “You just blew our cover.”
Darien Fawkes: “Oh, I just blew our cover?”
Bobby Hobbes: “Yes, they just made us. N, no no, don’t look, don’t look, don’t look.”
Darien Fawkes: “Would you relax? Looks like they’re making each other Hobbes.”
Bobby Hobbes: “Stand up slowly and walk to the street. Do it.”
Darien Fawkes: “Look, Hobbes, would you just calm down?”
Bobby Hobbes: “Do as I say, you’re out of your league.”
Darien Fawkes: “Oh, I’m out of my league? Out of my league. Just what league would that be? Oh, of course, the uh, psycho secret agent softball league.”
The Pilot

“I can’t believe it, half my men combing the states for him and the idiot shows up in my own backyard.”
Arnaud De Ferhn to Huisclos regarding Darien Fawkes, The Pilot

The Official: “Now wait a minute, wait a minute. Where’re, where’re you calling from? You calling from Mexico? You on a cell phone? Huh? You have any idea what that costs?!”
Darien Fawkes: “Wait a minute, listen. Do not talk to me about roaming charges, OK? I am roaming here, in the land of homicidal Canadians.”
The Pilot

Darien Fawkes: “You have to send me some backup.”
The Official: “Oh, I wouldn’t worry about it kid, you got Hobbes.”
Darien Fawkes: “Hobbes needs prozac, OK? I need help.”
The Official: “Your needs. Your needs. Is that all you ever think about huh?”
Darien Fawkes: “Don’t pull that crap, you need me.”
The Official: “Hmm, so what’re you gonna do kid? Quit?”
Darien Fawkes: “You know what? You know what? I just might. Because let me tell you, I would rather live crazy, die sane.”
The Pilot

Cook: “Are you him?”
Darien Fawkes: “Him?”
Cook: “El Hombre Invisible.”
Darien Fawkes: “What if I was?”
Cook: There would be a message for you.”
Darien Fawkes: “Oh yeah? And would you give it to me?”
Cook: “I could, but he asked that you get it yourself.”
*the cook nods towards a glass tank with spiders crawling inside, and a note*
The Pilot

Bobby Hobbes: “That was very impressive. What is it?”
Darien Fawkes: “It’s directions.”
Bobby Hobbes: “To what?”
Darien Fawkes: “Says I should come alone or they’ll kill her.”
Bobby Hobbes: “Well, that’s what they always say, you don’t believe that. Do you? You’re not gonna do this alone. Listen, no matter what you may say, we’re partners.”
The Pilot

“Disappearing act.”
Bobby Hobbes regarding Darien’s going invisible and leaving him behind, The Pilot

Arnaud De Ferhn: “Now listen, we’ll keep her alive until he gets here. Keep her occupied, we’ll take care of her later.”
Huisclos: “What?”
Arnaud De Ferhn: “I said we’ll kill her later.”
Huisclos: “Is that what we’ll do?”
Arnaud De Ferhn: “Huisclos, now is hardly the time.”
Huisclos: “I don’t care. She’s a good woman, she’s very kind to me. I’m not gonna let you just use her and throw her away. And I won’t let you use me!”
Arnaud De Ferhn: “OK, OK. I’m sorry. We’ll just have to be a bit more creative.”
*Arnaud then shoots Huisclos in the foot and hits him over the head with the gun*
The Pilot

Casey O’Claire: “What happened?”
Arnaud De Ferhn: “Easy, easy, easy. The idiot left his safety off, he shot himself in the foot. I think he’s in shock.”
The Pilot

“The attacks were unbearable now. My sanity was slipping like a brick on a Frisco hill. To go invisible might just push me over the edge. But I had to try. This wasn’t about me anymore, this was for my brother, my girl. My conscience was calling, and it was time to get De Ferhn”
Darien Fawkes (voice over), The Pilot

“Sound triggered alarms. Slightest noise’d set’em off. Well, I guess invisibility alone wasn’t gonna cut it here.”
Darien Fawkes (voice over) before using his wristwatch to set off the alarm as a decoy, The Pilot

“Good afternoon Mr. Fawkes. You’re not feeling very well are you? It’s quicksilver madness. Don’t worry, it’s only going to get worse.”
Arnaud De Ferhn to Darien Fawkes over an intercom system, The Pilot

“Remember, don’t aim for the head!”
Arnaud De Ferhn to the terrorists, The Pilot

“Nobody move or the gland gets it!”
Darien Fawkes to Arnaud De Ferhn and the terrorists after jumping out of the weapons locker with a shotgun aimed at his head, The Pilot

Arnaud De Ferhn: “And what is it you want Monsieur? Hmm?”
Darien Fawkes: “I want her out of here right now.”
Arnaud De Ferhn: “No, I mean what is it that you really want?”
*Arnaud holds up a bottle of counteragent*
Arnaud De Ferhn: “You can almost smell it can’t you? The counteragent. You can’t resist, believe me, I know. I helped design it that way.”
Darien Fawkes: “What?”
Arnaud De Ferhn: “You don’t think that I would create an invisible man without a means to control him do you? I mean alone he’d be all-powerful, but making him dependent on a drug, a counteragent…”
Darien Fawkes: “My God, you sound like a cheap pusher.”
Arnaud De Ferhn: “A regulator, Monsieur.Terrorism is the currency of the twenty-first century. And quicksilver will corner the market. I can sell the gland to as many zealots as I want. And their violence begets more buyers. And that’s fine, because no matter where they go, or what they do, they have to come back to me for this.”
Darien Fawkes: “That is a.. I mean that’s a… That’s a great scam.”
Arnaud De Ferhn: “You think?”
Darien Fawkes: “Oh hell, yeah. It’s a license to print money.”
Arnaud De Ferhn: “Well then, come on board.”
Darien Fawkes: “You killed my brother.”
Arnaud De Ferhn: “So what? I’ll kill mine. We’ll be even. We’re the brothers you and I. Our natures are the same. ‘Sides, I’m the only one who knows how to take the gland out.”
The Pilot

“Huisclos confessed to everything, In the end the poor schmo felt so guilty, he’d of taken the rap for snatching the Lindbergh baby.”
Darien Fawkes (voice over), The Pilot

“As for De Ferhn, well, they never did find a body. All I know is the flames meant for him took the last of my brother’s project. With the lab destroyed, the quicksilver process, all of Kevin’s work, was lost forever. And me, you ask… Well, my brother’s legacy may have been out of sight, but it sure as hell wasn’t out of my mind.”
Darien Fawkes (voice over), The Pilot

Darien Fawkes (voice over): “I believe in God, not ’cause I’m religious, but, ’cause there’s gotta be a being with a bigger sense of irony than me. After all this, I still needed the counteragent. And there was only one person left I could turn to.”
The Official: “Good afternoon Mr. Fawkes”
Darien Fawkes: “Let’s just say, uh, for the sake of argument, I got a .45 in my pocket.”
The Official: “I’d say talk to them.”
*two Agency agents walk up*
The Official: “Come on kid, we both knew we would end like this.”
*The Official walks up to Darien and pulls out a paper*
The Official: “W4 you can fill out here, but I’ll need your social security number for the I9 form.”
Darien Fawkes: “Wait, wait a minute, wait a minute. You trying to hire me?”
The Official: “Come on kid, face facts, could be years before we figure out how to get you de-glanded. Why not make the best of it?”
Darien Fawkes: “Hey, you know what? Why don’t you save your breath, OK? I’m not my brother.”
The Official: “No, but you got a piece of him. You use it right, you could be more.”
Darien Fawkes: “I don’t wanna be more. I just want to be me.”
The Official: “Yeah?”
Darien Fawkes: “Yeah.”
The Official: “And who is that?”
Darien Fawkes: “He’s the guy who’s telling you to go screw off.”
The Official: “Ah, I thought you were the guy who needed the counteragent. We salvaged enough data from the wreckage to reproduce it. The way I see it, you need your shots, we need your services. Sounds like a trade to me.”
Darien Fawkes: “No, sounds like the same scam Arnaud was gonna run.”
The Official: “Heh, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, it’s a good scam.”
Darien Fawkes: “No, it’s not. It’s.. It’s…”
The Official: “Evil?”
Darien Fawkes: “Yeah!”
The Official: “Like my good old mom always said, ‘Anything done out of love, is beyond good and evil.’ Heh heh heh heh, me? I love my job. Come on, let’s talk pension plan huh?”
The Pilot

“Santayana once said that ‘Those who do not learn from history, are doomed to repeat it.’ Well if that’s true then I’m screwed. ‘Cause here I am, repeating history all over again. See I was a thief, a good thief. OK, not so good. I got caught, tried, convicted. Then I got a reprieve. Or so I thought. Turned out, I was better off in prison. But somewhere in this room, is my ticket out of this mess. Hey, you know the, the JFK quote about not asking about what your country can do for you, but what you can do for your country? Well, I may not be a patriot, but I know a thing or two about gratitude.”
Darien Fawkes (voice over) as he breaks into The Official’s office, The Catevari

Kevin Fawkes (voice over): “We’ve engineered a bio-synthetic gland. We’re going to attach it to your cerebral cortex. Once the gland is activated it secretes a synthetic hormone I call quicksilver. You’re invisible not because we see through you, but around you. You also have the ability to quicksilver other objects. Remember, if you can learn to control the gland, you may be able to achieve partial invisibility. Because quicksilver doesn’t reflect light, we find the subject’s surface area drops below freezing. OK, now here’s the downside, quicksilver madness. Unfortunately, the gland also works as a cerebral disinhibitor, which can lead to violent outbursts. We’ve managed to put together a counteragent to block the gland. It should hold you for six days.”
Darien Fawkes (flashback): “You mean I gotta get like fixed up every week?”
Kevin Fawkes (voice over): “Or more, if you go invisible too much.”
The Official (flashback): “You need your shots, we need your services. Sounds like a trade to me.”
Darien Fawkes (voice over): Oh yeah, my country’d given me a lot all right. And now it was time for a little payback.”
The Catevari

Darien Fawkes: “Who the hell are you?”
*the person shoots Darien with a tranquilizer dart*
The Keeper: “I’m your keeper.”
The Catevari

“There once was a story about a man who could turn invisible. I thought it was only a story, until it happened to me. OK, so here’s how it works. There’s this stuff called quicksilver that can bend light. Some scientist made it into a synthetic gland and that’s where I came in. See, I was facing life in prison and they were looking for a human experiment. So, we made a deal. They put the gland in my brain, I walk free. The operation was a success, but that’s where everything started to go wrong.”
Darien Fawkes (voice over), season one opening, first time heard, The Catevari

“What’s the best thing about government service? For me, it’s the health plan. You can get better, you can get worse, or you can just get with the program. This is the story of how Darien Fawkes got all three.”
Darien Fawkes (voice over), The Catevari

The Official: “How long do I have to put up with this?”
The Keeper: “Well, we’ll see.”
The Official: “All I see is him giving me attitude. You said you could break him in.”
The Keeper: “I didn’t say it would be easy. Blackmailing him with a shot of counteragent won’t make him a willing participant.”
Darien Fawkes (in straight jacket): Hey! Hey! Hey round boy! Woo! Hey buddy! Hey, I’m talking to you!”
The Official: “This guy’s about to turn into a walking id. What’re you going to do? Just hold back on his shot?”
The Keeper: “No. No, I’m going to do more than that. I’m gonna get him to trust me.”
The Catevari

The Keeper: “Looking good mate.”
Darien Fawkes: “yeah, well I’m trying to make the cover of ‘Lab Rat Monthly’. What’s your excuse?”
The Keeper: “Well, I’ve been up forty-nine hours.”
Darien Fawkes: “Hot date?”
The Keeper: “Watching you.”
*Darien turns invisible*
The Keeper: “Shyness is cute, but it’s only bringing you closer to madness.”
Darien Fawkes: “Yeah? What do you know?”
The Keeper: “I know the excess quicksilver is breaking down your higher cortical functions. I know it’s releasing your darker inhibitions.”
Darien Fawkes: “I’m handling it!”
The Keeper: And I know that the madness takes hold after thirty minutes of quicksilver use, and even if you don’t go invisible the gland still secretes. The most sanity you can ever expect to have is six days mate, and I would say you’re three minutes short of that.”
*Darien reappears*
The Keeper: “I want you to trust me. You’ve got a gift mate, one that could do so much good. Or, without guidance, destroy you. Now, call me crazy but, I kind of like you alive.”
Darien Fawkes: “Well, you’re a real sweetheart then aren’tcha?”
The Keeper: “If you get to know me. You want to get to know me?”
Darien Fawkes: “I am not going to be your freakin’ slave.”
The Keeper: “Then show me you can be more. Accept The Official’s deal. Help him and let me help you.”
Darien Fawkes: “Why should I trust you?”
The Keeper: “Because I came in here knowing you could go insane and kill me. Trust works both ways.”
The Catevari

“All right Kasperoff, we’re gonna take Big Blue.”
San Pablo Military Infirmary Doctor to Warren before taking Charlie Fogerty away from the chess table, The Catevari

Warren: “Fogerty? You’re awake? Where, where.. Where ya been?”
Charlie Fogerty: “On a trip bro, long, long trip. But it’s OK, I’m back.”
Said after Charlie Fogerty woke up from a 30 year ‘coma’
The Catevari

Warren: “Wha.. Wha, what are you doing?”
Charlie Fogerty: “Breaking you out. It’s all right Warren, take my hand. Go ahead. That’s it. That’s it.”
Said while Charlie Fogerty uses the poisons in his body to mercy kill Warren
The Catevari

Darien Fawkes: “So this guy, Charlie Fogerty, breaks out of some asylum and you want me to catch him? I thought you schmucks were in the spy racket.”
The Official: “Our racket is handling cases other agencies can’t.”
Eberts: “Or won’t.”
The Official: “Or don’t. Point is I need yo..”
Darien Fawkes: “No, I got it, I got it. This schmo isn’t just some head case.”
Eberts: “He’s a catevari.”
Darien Fawkes: “Is that a sexual position or an Italian opera?”
The Official: “What he is, is our business. All you need to know is what he does.”
Darien Fawkes: “Draws pictures with crayons?”
Eberts: “He kills people Mr. Fawkes. Very quickly, very violently.”
Darien Fawkes: “So, uh, why do you guys think I can take him?”
The Official: “He can’t kill what he can’t see. Plus we think your quicksilver coating will act as a barrier against his touch.”
Darien Fawkes: “Touch?”
Eberts: “what makes him lethal. Skin, nails, bodily fluids.”
Darien Fawkes: Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Is this guy going to kill me or date me?”
The Official: “It’s irrelevant what he tries. You’re going to bring him in alive.”
Darien Fawkes: “Why alive?”
The Official: “That’s personal.”
Darien Fawkes: “Uh, OK, you know what? Uh, fellas, I’m not a bounty hunter, OK? I mean, really, I, I.. I wouldn’t know where to start, OK?”
The Official: “Hey, don’t worry about it. We’re linking you up with our top guy.”
Darien Fawkes: “Yeah, yeah, it’s OK. Your last top man almost got me killed.”
Eberts: “It’s different this time.”
The Catevari

“He’s been in therapy.”
The Official to Darien Fawkes after The Agency’s top guy, Bobby Hobbes comes into the office, The Catevari

Darien Fawkes: “Hey, can I ask you a question?”
Bobby Hobbes: “Fifty milligrams. You don’t like it, get out and walk! Sorry, that was hostile. Look, I understand you may have.. feelings about working with me. Most people do. But I also know that you’re new at this, like a… like a child wandering in the woods..”
Darien Fawkes: “Hobbes, I was…”
Bobby Hobbes: “And, and and. I as your senior have been asked to shepherd you.”
Darien Fawkes: “What is a catevari?”
Bobby Hobbes: “Ah ha ha ha. Ha ha! They didn’t tell you that did they? No, Mr. ‘I’m so unseeable I get twice my partners pay’.”
Darien Fawkes: “Look, it’s a simple question. Either you know the answer…”
Bobby Hobbes: “Nothing is simple in this business pal! Not the blood! Not the guilt! Not the.. vacation that fat schmuck owes me..”
Darien Fawkes: “I was asking about the mission!”
Bobby Hobbes: “You don’t ask! You can’t do that! You don’t got that kind of clearance son! You do the mission!”
Darien Fawkes: “Oh, without knowing anything?”
Bobby Hobbes: “The less you know, the happier you are. Now that’s intelligence.”
Darien Fawkes: “No, that’s retarded.”
Bobby Hobbes: “That’s freedom my friend. The right to shut up and do as you’re told. Don’t like it, move to Russia.”
The Catevari

“I feel the charm of our facility is not at it’s apex. You must please to excuse the air of chaos and hopelessness. As you can see, we are really shortly staffed at the current moment.”
Nurse to Darien Fawkes and Bobby Hobbes as they walk into a room full of dead bodies, The Catevari

Bobby Hobbes: “Lips are epoxy blue. They were poisoned.”
Nurse: “It’s a neural toxic, cerebral disruptor. It paralyzes the muscles and then turns their brains into so much wet mismati.”
Darien Fawkes: Wait, let me, let me get this straight. So you’re sayin’ that he did this by scratching them?”
Nurse: “He is a catevari, were you not briefed?”
Bobby Hobbes: “He’ll get briefed when he grows up.”
The Catevari

Bobby Hobbes: “Yeah, you got something, let it out.”
Darien Fawkes: “No, why don’t you answer something for me first, huh? Is this some kind of Agency nuthouse?”
Bobby Hobbes: “Well, what if it is?”
Darien Fawkes: “‘Cause I’d rather die than end up here.”
Bobby Hobbes: “Well that’s patriotic.”
Darien Fawkes: “Yeah, well it may be why our friend offed this guy, huh? Look, look. See the wounds? How gentle they are, how calm this guy looks?”
Bobby Hobbes: “What are you saying? It’s some kind of mercy killing?”
Darien Fawkes: “No, I’m saying go back and look at the doctors. The guys that poked and pricked and prodded him. Look at the slash marks. Look, look, look at the slash marks on this guys face.”
*Darien points to Charlie Fogerty’s first doctor victim*
Darien Fawkes: “What does that say to you Hobbes? Huh? Revenge. I’m tellin’ you, this guy wanted revenge.”
Bobby Hobbes: “You know what I think?”
Darien Fawkes: “What?”
*Bobby Hobbes holds up a bed sheet with “My rain shall fall like crazy fingers” written on it in blood*
Bobby Hobbes: “I think he’s not finished yet.”
The Catevari

The Official: “Revenge?”
Darien Fawkes: “Well, yeah, that’s..”
Bobby Hobbes: “”that’s my theory, yeah, mmhm.”
The Official: “On who?”
Bobby Hobbes: “well, actually I was..”
Darien Fawkes: “You done?”
The Catevari

Darien Fawkes: “What’s catevari?”
The Official: “A word.”
Darien Fawkes: “Uh, OK, you know what? Uh, why don’t you cut the ‘Three Days of the Condor’ crap, OK? You got a fruitcake out there with poison fingers and a pretentious Latin name. Now, I want some answers.”
Bobby Hobbes: “Ooh, ladeda. Next he’s gonna wanna know who killed Kennedy, right? Oop.. What have I been trying to teach you? It’s do or die in this job, huh? You want answers go to college.”
Darien Fawkes: “Wait, wait look, look. I just, I wanna know what I’m risking my ass for.”
Bobby Hobbes: “Your country!”
Darien Fawkes: “My country? Wait, you know what? I got better things to die for.”
Bobby Hobbes: “Yeah? Like what?”
Darien Fawkes: “Like me.”
The Catevari

“Well you aren’t you anymore. Embrace the whore, you’re serving the state.”
The Official to Darien Fawkes, The Catevari

Darien Fawkes: “Since when did you start listening to me?”
The Official: “Since I think you got some unique insight.”
The Catevari

Senator Miven: “Boy? I’m told you can protect my dignity as well as my person.”
Darien Fawkes: “Oh, you mean uh, can I be your bodyguard without making you look like a total coward? Guess that depends on what you’re afraid of.”
The Catevari

“Guess it takes one to know one.”
Darien Fawkes to Senator Miven after the senator calls him a malfeasant freak, The Catevari

Darien Fawkes: “Hey, what do you want pal? I did my duty.”
Bobby Hobbes: “Oh really? I don’t recall getting a United States senator killed in the job description.”
Darien Fawkes: “I saved the freakin’ baby.”
Bobby Hobbes: “That’s not doing your duty. That’s being a nice guy.”
The Catevari

Bobby Hobbes: “Fawkes, you don’t understand!”
Darien Fawkes: “I understand fine. You don’t even know what a ‘catevari’ is.”
Bobby Hobbes: “It was a need to know assignment.”
Darien Fawkes: “Yeah? So why didn’t they tell you?”
Bobby Hobbes: “Obviously I didn’t need to know.”
The Catevari

Darien Fawkes: “Hobbes?”
Bobby Hobbes: “What?”
Darien Fawkes: “I looked it up in the dictionary. Catevari.”
Bobby Hobbes: “Right.”
Darien Fawkes: “It’s old Latin. The Romans, they, they used to take babies. You know, little babies. And they would feed them poison, Hobbes.”
Bobby Hobbes: “Right.”
Darien Fawkes: “And then they would do it for years. Just enough so it wouldn’t kill’em. But it would build up in their system see?”
Bobby Hobbes: “What do you mean?”
Darien Hobbes: “And then eventually, they would become poisonous. Do you see what I’m saying?”
Bobby Hobbes: “What are you saying?”
The Catevari

“This is not a good time.”
The Official to Darien Fawkes and Bobby Hobbes as they come into his office to see Charlie Fogerty in there with him, The Catevari

The Official: “Don’t encourage him.”
Darien Fawkes: “I don’t want your encouragement.”
The Official: “You didn’t get him.”
The Catevari

Darien Fawkes: “He’s an experiment isn’t he? Just like me. You were part of it weren’tcha?”
The Official: “Yeah. 1969. You have to remember everything was different then. Berlin had a wall, Russians had the bomb, Ike was dead. And I can’t excuse us by saying ‘everybody was doing it’. But they were. KGB. CIA. FBI. Everybody was experimenting with new chemical weapons. We had to keep up, or get left behind. So we developed the catevari program.”
Darien Fawkes: “The human chemical weapon.”
The Keeper: “It’s not complicated. Yeah, you introduce poison gradually into the body. It, it builds up in the subjects bodily fluids to deadly levels while the carrier himself becomes immune.”
The Official: “And he can destroy with a touch.”
Darien Fawkes: “So you schmucks did just copy the Romans?”
The Keeper: And the ancient Greeks. The Goths. Persians.”
The Official: You think you were the first human experiments? We didn’t use babies, we used one of our own. Charlie Fogerty, was the fair hair boy of The Agency. The best of us. More than anything he wanted to serve his country. When we developed the poison we thought could be infused into his body without killing him, a brain disruptor like the one that causes the quicksilver madness. But, we miscalculated. The drugs given Fogerty paralyzed his body, literally blew out his mind. He’s been a full catatonic ever since.”
Darien Fawkes: “So what the hell woke him up?”
The Official: “Well, we decided to try a series of injections, to try and clean out the poison in his body. But, well, we’d assumed his mind was long gone.”
Darien Fawkes: “Gone?”
The Official: “Yes.”
Darien Fawkes: “Wait, hey, that guy’s been aware of everything.”
The Official: “What?”
Darien Fawkes: “‘My rain shall fall like crazy fingers.’”
Bobby Hobbes: “It’s a Grateful Dead song from the Seventies.”
Darien Fawkes: “Exactly. Your pal has been stuck in frozen crazy hell for over thirty years. Wait a minute, that, that’s why you sent me to catch him isn’t it? You send an experiment to catch an experiment.”
The Keeper: “Can you think of a better idea?”
Darien Fawkes: “Hey? Why the hell didn’t you tell me?”
Bobby Hobbes: “Would you have gone against the guy if you knew what he was?”
Darien Fawkes: “Hell no!”
Bobby Hobbes: “There you go.”
The Official: “Darien. Charlie Fogerty was my best friend. I was hoping you’d bring him in alive.”
Darien Fawkes: “I think we still can.”
The Official: “No kid, no. No, if he’ll go after me, he’ll go after anybody.”
Darien Fawkes: “So what are you saying? You want to kill him now?”
The Official: “I’m saying, we have to put aside the personal and look to the greater good.”
Darien Fawkes: “I mean think about the… What ‘greater good’? There’s no difference between him and me.”
The Official: “He tried to kill me. And you saved my life.”
The Keeper: “I’d say that’s a difference.”
The Catevari

Bobby Hobbes: “There’s at least thirty people associated with the catevari project. This Dr. Ike, the guy who invented the poison, you sure he’s the next target?”
Darien Fawkes: “Why is this all my call?”
Bobby Hobbes: “Well, you’re an angry experiment, our boy’s an angry experiment. The big kahuna thinks there’s a simpatico vibe going.”
Darien Fawkes: “What do you think? What do you think? You don’t, do you? You don’t ask questions, you just, you bitch and you moan, but hell, you’ll just do whatever they tell you to, won’tcha?”
Bobby Hobbes: “That’s right. And while you’re sitting there whining about how the bad man put that nasty gland in your head, some of us have been out here getting our butts shot off! Now I have starved and frozen and bled for my country and I would do it again!”
Darien Fawkes: “Well, there’s a big difference now.”
Bobby Hobbes: “Yeah? What’s that?”
Darien Fawkes: “This time somebody told you what you’re really up against. Hobbes, you don’t get it, do ya? I mean, this guy Fogerty, he’s both of us. The fat man is sending you to kill you.”
Bobby Hobbes: “Yeah? Well that’s fine, because I would kill me if I thought I was a threat.”
The Catevari

“And don’t think I don’t know where you are twenty-four seven my friend!”
Bobby Hobbes to Darien Fawkes after Darien disappears and runs off, The Catevari

“If I’d been shot, I wouldn’t go after the guy who made the bullet. I’d want the guy who put it in me. Dr. Ike didn’t count for squat. It was his keeper Fogerty was after. I sure hoped I was right, ’cause the way my head was poundin’, I was on the verge of becoming as whacked as Fogerty.”
Darien Fawkes (voice over), The Catevari

Darien Fawkes: “Charles Fogerty.”
Charlie Fogerty: “That particular dude went on a long trip bro.”
Darien Fawkes: “So, uh, you knew I’d come.”
Charlie Fogerty: “You knew I’d be here.”
Darien Fawkes: “Yeah, it’s who I would have gone for if I were you.”
Charlie Fogerty: “You are me. So, they gave you one too huh? A keeper. Did she pull that enigmatic crap on you?”
Darien Fawkes: “Oh, you mean the, the dart guns and stuff.”
Charlie Fogerty: “Little messages in a bottle.”
Darien Fawkes: “Oh yeah, the, the uh, the whole ‘you’ve got a gift speech.”
Charlie Fogerty: “Sucks, doesn’t it?”
Darien Fawkes: “Could be worse.”
Charlie Fogerty: “And it gets worse.”
The Catevari

Darien Fawkes: “You gotta listen to me. They’re not screwin’ around OK? You can’t be brought in I gotta kill ya.”
Charlie Fogerty: “And you’re going to save me, is that it?”
*Darien starts getting the symptoms that he is nearing quicksilver madness*
Charlie Fogerty: “You can’t even save yourself.”
Darien Fawkes: “Yeah, well, we can try.”
The Catevari

Charlie Fogerty: “Kill us? I’m just ending the experiment.”
Darien Fawkes: “Look Charlie, we don’t..”
Charlie Fogerty: “Don’t you get it? What they did to me just laid the groundwork for you. And you’re just leadin’em on a path to someone else. Now it’s over! We’re not gonna let’em have one piece of us. Not one atom!”
Said after Charlie Fogerty reveals the explosives strapped to his vest, The Catevari

“Nice try. Nice try, but then again you’re not my keeper are you? I’ve got eight quarts of neurotoxin in my blood, you think your little tranquilizer’s going to put me to sleep? Ha!”
Charlie Fogerty to The Keeper after she shoots him with a tranquilizer dart, The Catevari

The Keeper: “He’s not like you.”
Charlie Fogerty: “No, and he never will be.”
*Charlie Fogerty starts the timer on the explosives*
Said about Darien Fawkes, The Catevari

“Look at yourself. It’s not the future you want. To be me. To go through thirty years, every day your body frozen, your mind melting away. To wake up and not be able to tough the thing you love the most. Without destroying it.”
Charlie Fogerty to Darien Fawkes, The Catevari

“Have a, a good life.”
Charlie Fogerty to Darien Fawkes just before Charlie dies, The Catevari

The Official: “Under the circumstances, I would have to say you did your duty.”
Darien Fawkes: “Yeah, well I guess I’m just a real team player.”
The Official: “You tell me kid, you caught a killer and saved a baby, what’s not to feel proud of?”
Darien Fawkes: “He was your best friend, how do you feel?”
The Official: “Like I served my country. They tell me Charlie could have killed you, maybe he was coming around.”
Darien Fawkes: No, I think it was revenge.”
The Catevari

The Keeper: “How do you feel?”
Darien Fawkes: “Hmm, I guess like you. Went into another room where another guy could go insane and kill me. Except I couldn’t save him. Can I ask you a question? All right, let’s say I use this little gift thing right. OK, you know, play the hero, do everything I’m supposed to. How do I know I don’t end up just like Charles Fogerty?”
The Keeper: “Trust me.”
The Catevari

“In his very first story, Sherlock Holmes met his match. Her name was Irene Adler. But, as Dr. Watson points out, she was always ‘The Woman’. The woman who eluded him. The woman who got away. For Sherlock it was a mystery. For me, it was elementary.”
Darien Fawkes (voice over), Ralph

“Hold on. Allow me to introduce you to America’s greatest sport; huntin’. Or as I like to call it; waitin’.
American Delegate to Oman Tariq, Ralph

“Just make sure Ivan the Terrible doesn’t mistake me for Bambi, OK?”
Agent to another Agent over earpiece, Ralph

American Delegate: “Now, while we’re ‘waitin”..”
Oman Tariq: “You said pleasure, no business.”
American Delegate: Well then, just think of this as an invitation to a little pool party we call NATO.”
Ralph

Oman Tariq: “What’s this?”
American Delegate: Oh, good eyes! That is an endangered peregrine falcon.”
*Oman Tariq starts to aim his gun until it is pushed down by the American delegate*
American Delegate: “We protect him, just like we protect you.”
*Oman Tariq is shot and killed*
Ralph

Bobby Hobbes: “Death takes no vacations my friend.”
Darien Fawkes: “Hobbes, it’s a falcon, OK? It’s not the Maltese Falcon. Now, can we drop the prose and get out of here please?”
Bobby Hobbes: “Why don’t you have a little respect for the dead?”
Darien Fawkes: “It’s a bird!”
The Keeper: “You’re both endangered creatures Darien. Question is, when you die what will the birds say?”
Ralph

Darien Fawkes: “Why are we here?”
Bobby Hobbes: “Well, the Buddhists would say that life is…”
Darien Fawkes: “OK, let me rephrase that. How the hell does this Agency get it’s cases?”
Bobby Hobbes: “Agency? What agency? Lower the vibe cowboy.”
Darien Fawkes: “The top secret one you work for. You know, the agency that, that chases terrorists one week and then oh, shuts down the next ’cause the copier breaks and they’re too cheap to service it.”
Ralph

Bobby Hobbes: “You need to learn to keep a low profile.”
Darien Fawkes: “God, how much lower a profile can you get than an agency that works for the Department of Fish and Game?”
Bobby Hobbes: “We don’t work for them.”
Darien Fawkes: “Oh, yeah right, we’re just out here on road kill duty earning our merit badge.”
Bobby Hobbes: “F and G’s like a landlord to us. They leave The Agency alone, let us do our cases, but occasionally we gotta pay rent. Like today with the dead bird, see?”
*a body bag is prepared to be moved, with a body inside*
Darien Fawkes: “Huh, somehow I don’t think that’s the only reason we’re here.”
Ralph

Darien Fawkes: “Wait a minute. You were in the FBI?”
Jones: “Yeah, big emphasis on ‘were’.”
Talking about Bobby Hobbes, Ralph

Bobby Hobbes: “Why don’t you step over here and say that again?”
Jones: “Yeah, but you know, then I’d have to take you seriously. I can’t risk that.”
Ralph

The Official: “Gentlemen, take a good look. Because we will not rest until the senseless death of this national symbol of… flight, is avenged.”
Eberts: “Any questions?”
Darien Fawkes: “Yeah, uh, when you gonna cut the crap?”
Ralph

The Official: “The president has publicly called for vengeance. And this agency needs to answer that call.”
Bobby Hobbes: “Let’s do it!”
Darien Fawkes: “Hey guys, guys, come on. I mean the actual words ‘off limits’ were spoken by the FBI.”
Bobby Hobbes: “Screw the FBI.”
The Official: “No, kid’s right. A foreign dignitary was killed on our soil, and that is FBI’s jurisdiction. But, an endangered bird was killed in a national park, and that belongs to Fish and Game.”
Eberts: “Our temporary sponsors.”
The Official: “Enter The Agency.”
Ralph

Bobby Hobbes: “Where do you think you’re going?”
Darien Fawkes: “Nah, I don’t do the detective thing. That’s your department.”
Bobby Hobbes: “Wait, wait, wait, wait. You insulting me?”
Ralph

The Official: “Hey, Hobbes, he’s not insulting you. Take it easy, OK? The kid has a tougher assignment.”
*The Official tosses Darien Fawkes a folder*
The Official: “And thanks Fawkes for the heads up on the witness, we were able to get a file on her.”
Darien Fawkes: “Great. What’s it got to do with me?”
The Official: “Go on, it’s a page turner.”
Ralph

Darien Fawkes (reading a quote in Jessica Semplar’s file from her mother): “‘The only person Jessica is talking to is Ralph, her invisible best friend.’”
The Official: “And guess who you are.”
Ralph

Fran: “Post traumatic stress disorder. Talking therapies aren’t working ’cause she won’t talk to me.”
Jones: “We don’t need a diagnosis Fran, we need an ID on the sniper.”
Anders: “How do you know she saw him?”
Jones: “Well, look who’s back early from Tahoe. What? You miss work Anders?”
Anders: “No, but I read the news. Apparently you people can’t hold down the fort without me.”
Ralph

Darien Fawkes: “You win.”
*Jessica Semplar looks around scared*
Darien Fawkes: “No, no, no. Don’t, don’t be scared. It’s just me, Ralph.”
Jessica Semplar: “Ralph?”
Darien Fawkes: “Yeah. Hey! Uh, you wanna play again? How ’bout two out of three? Oh, I got an idea. How ’bout checkers?”
*Darien Fawkes picks up two checkers, making them look like they’re floating where his eyes would be if he were visible*
Jessica Semplar: “Heheh, you’re not Ralph.”
Darien Fawkes: “I’m not Ralph?”
Jessica Semplar: “No.”
*Darien Fawkes drops the checkers*
Darien Fawkes: “Why? Did you change my name?”
Jessica Semplar: “No.”
Darien Fawkes: “Then who am I?”
Jessica Semplar: “You sound weird. Different.”
Darien Fawkes: “Yeah, well that’s because, before I was uh, I was talking to your inner ear and uh, now I’m talking to your outer ear.”
Jessica Semplar: “I knew that.”
Ralph

“You are cold.”
Jessica Semplar to Darien Fawkes/Ralph after pinky swearing with him that he’ll stay in her room until she can unlock his ‘house’ so he doesn’t get cold outside, Ralph

Darien Fawkes: “Ralph to Harvey, over.”
Bobby Hobbes: “Harvey to Ralph, Harvey to Ralph. What’s your sit-rep?”
Darien Fawkes: “What?!”
Bobby Hobbes: “Your sit-rep! Your sit-rep!”
Darien Fawkes: “Uh.. yeah, I gotta tell you, I don’t know what the hell that means. But, I think I’m pretty close to an id here. Wow! Man, she is quite the artist.”
Bobby Hobbes: “See if she can make a sketch of the killer’s face, or maybe his weapon, I can work with that.”
Ralph

Darien Fawkes: “Wait a minute, what am I doing here?”
Bobby Hobbes: “How’s that? Come in, I’m losing ya.”
Darien Fawkes: “Hobbes, this isn’t right. I’m getting out of here.”
Bobby Hobbes: “‘Isn’t right’? May I remind you that you’re a thief?”
Darien Fawkes: “Yeah, uh, ex-thief, OK?”
Bobby Hobbes: “Whatever. You can change your job but you can’t change who you are. Now you got a job to do, do it!”
Ralph

“Son, just because you drop the ball doesn’t mean there’s not gonna be a second half.”
The Official to Darien Fawkes, Ralph

Darien Fawkes: “OK, this whole mission is evil.”
The Official: “Evil Shmeevil. You were all gung ho yesterday.”
Darien Fawkes: “I will never be gung ho about anything this Agency ever does.”
The Official: “Fine. Hobbes, you take the kids.”
Darien Fawkes: “Hobbes?”
Bobby Hobbes: “I’ll get it out of her.”
Ralph

Darien Fawkes: “Well, yeah. I mean, she’s a little girl. I mean, I… I’m not gonna subject her to that bi-polar James Bond. You gotta fix me.”
The Keeper: “Did you break yourself already?”
Darien Fawkes: “No. No no no no, the wonder-gland is busted, and I need to use it, a lot.”
The Keeper: “Relax, this happens to a lot of men.”
Darien Fawkes: “Oh, really? They, they can’t go invisible? That’s interesting.”
The Keeper: “They can’t deal with their emotions. Were you experiencing strong emotions when you last tried to quicksilver?”
Darien Fawkes: “Why?”
The Keeper: “Because the gland sits in the part of your brain that generates emotion response, and it’s still learning how to process those signals.”
Darien Fawkes: “Wait a minute, are, are you saying that the gland has a learning problem?”
The Keeper: “As far as that gland knows you’re still a baby. It takes babies fifteen months to learn how to talk. Practice your bio-feedback, your, your deep-breathing, your meditation. If you want to get your quicksilvering under control you’re going to have to do the same thing for your feelings.”
Darien Fawkes: “Now why is that? Is that because the quicksilver and the emotions, they don’t mix?”
The Keeper: “No, because the quicksilver and your blood stream doesn’t mix.You use too much, you’ll reach quicksilver madness.”
Darien Fawkes: “No biggy, just give me a shot of counteragent.”
The Keeper: “No, I won;t have another one ready for at least forty-eight hours.”
Darien Fawkes: “Wait, wait, wait. Time out here. Uh, wait a minute. You mean, you’re out? I mean, how, how can you just be out?”
The Keeper: “Well, it, it takes time to synthesize the formula.”
Darien Fawkes: “Uh, shouldn’t you be making extra? I mean, you know, in case of an emergency? Like uh, oh I don’t know, I became a psychopathic killer?”
The Keeper: “No, doesn’t store well.”
Darien Fawkes: “Doesn’t store well? OK, um, so what am I supposed to do here?”
The Keeper: “Avoid emotions.”
Darien Fawkes: “Like you do.”
The Keeper: “Then find an alternative to invisibility.”
Darien Fawkes: “Fine.”
Ralph

Jessica Semplar: “I’m not supposed to talk to you.”
Darien Fawkes/Ralph: “Wait, you’re not su.. Who says so?”
Jessica Semplar: “Mommy.”
Darien Fawkes/Ralph: “Oh, well, you know, we’re kinda talkin’ now.”
Jessica Semplar: “No we’re not.”
Darien Fawkes/Ralph: “Yeah we are.”
Jessica Semplar: “I’m not gonna play that game.”
Ralph

Jessica Semplar: “Ralph, you grew up.”
Darien Fawkes/Ralph: “Yeah, don’t worry. You’ll catch up.”
Jessica Semplar: “I’m glad you didn’t get hurt in the woods.”
Darien Fawkes/Ralph: “Yeah, I’m glad you didn’t get hurt. You know, I, I really didn’t even see the man that was out there that day.”
Jessica Semplar: “It wasn’t a man. It was a monster.”
Darien Fawkes/Ralph: “A monster? What, do you mean like a, like a cookie monster? What?”
*Jessica shows him a painting she did*
Jessica Semplar: “He came out of the ground. I was thinking that maybe he’s, you know, like an evil tree spirit and maybe you know him from the forest.”
Ralph

Darien Fawkes: “What? You telling me you never had an invisible friend?”
Bobby Hobbes: “I had invisible enemies.”
Ralph

Bobby Hobbes: “This is a strip off a ghillie suit.”
Darien Fawkes: “And uh, you knew to look for this how?”
Bobby Hobbes: “‘Cause I’m me Fawkes, because that’s what the kid drew. This isn’t a monster bro, it’s a sniper’s camouflage. There’s more than one way to go invisible hotshot, he’s a sniper. And the bad news is he’s good, real good. This is from a camouflage outfit that was covered with dirt and twigs and leaves. Any punk can own a g-suit but only a pro can use it like this.”
Ralph

“Listen, you just got shot. Where you going? Disney Land?”
The Keeper to Darien Fawkes, Ralph

Bobby Hobbes: “Feds got her under a twenty-four hour, two man watch. They’re not gonna let us anywhere near her.”
Darien Fawkes: “I’ll meet ya in the van.”
Bobby Hobbes: “Did you hear what I said? Jones is in there. We can’t get in!”
Darien Fawkes: “Then we won’t, I will.”
Bobby Hobbes: “Oh! Oh, what am I thinkin’? Of course, ’cause you got, you know the..”
*Bobby Hobbes snaps his fingers*
Bobby Hobbes: “I’ll be in the van.”
Ralph

The Keeper: “If you go out there you’re chancing quicksilver madness.”
Darien Fawkes: “Well, guess that’s a risk I’m gonna have to take.”
The Keeper: “Are you willing to put her at risk?”
Darien Fawkes: “What if I lay off the invisibility?”
The Keeper: “Doesn’t matter, the gland saturates your bloodstream whether or not you go invisible.”
Darien Fawkes: “OK, just, let me run up to the room for a second. You know, she’s gotta know that Ralph’s OK. And, I just wanna know she’s safe.”
Ralph

Jessica Semplar: “Ralph!”
Darien Fawkes/Ralph: “That’s my name, don’t wear it out.”
Jessica Semplar: “You’re a dork.”
Darien Fawkes/Ralph: “Hey, tell me about it.”
Ralph

Jessica Semplar: “No! Don’t do. I’m your only friend.”
Darien Fawkes/Ralph: “Huh, you know what? You may have a point there.”
Jessica Semplar: “And you’re my only friend.”
Darien Fawkes/Ralph: “Come on, huh? That can’t be true, right? What about like uh, you know, your pals at school and stuff? Huh?”
Jessica Semplar: “I wish I could be invisible.”
Darien Fawkes/Ralph: “What? You kidding? To deprive the world of one of its great beauties huh? Come on, that’s mean. That, that would be, very mean.”
Ralph

Darien Fawkes: “Yeah, I was just, uh, curious which one of you geniuses decided to put a sniper target in a room with a big picture window?”
FBI Agent: “Where the hell did you come from?”
Darien Fawkes: “Precisely, your security sucks.”
Ralph

Anders: “We already checked that angle.”
Darien Fawkes: “Why don’t you check again? Maybe you missed.”
*Anders then pushes Darien Fawkes down and shoots him multiple times*
Anders: “I didn’t miss you.”
Ralph

Jones: “What has Anders got to do with this?”
Bobby Hobbes: “Who do you think shot him, huh? He’s not dead, he’s wearing a lining. Very lucky for you pal.”
Ralph

Jones: “Oh, I get it. Because he was a sniper, he must be ‘the sniper’. That’s why you got kicked out Hobbes. You think you got a beef with the Bureau because of Quantico Bobby. But all you really got is a revenge fantasy to go along with every government pink slip in your shoe box. And guess what, now you are under arrest for interfering with an FBI investigation. You’re pathetic.”
Bobby Hobbes: “Oh, well that hurts.”
Ralph

Darien Fawkes: “She went home Hobbes.”
Bobby Hobbes: “All right, we’re there in five.”
Darien Fawkes: “No, no no, Hobbes! Not her home.”
Bobby Hobbes: “Who’s home?”
Ralph

“Fawkes, what’s the matter with you man? Come on, we don’t have time for your frickin’ wacko act. We gotta move! Fast! Come on, stay with it!”
Bobby Hobbes to Darien Fawkes, Ralph

Darien Fawkes: “Where is he?”
Bobby Hobbes: “Shh, shh. Gotta listen for ‘crack, bang’.”
Darien Fawkes: “‘Crack, bang’?”
Bobby Hobbes: “Time between shot and impact, and I need absolute silence to gauge it. Now, shut up.”
Ralph

“I am so sick of him shooting at me.”
Darien Fawkes to Bobby Hobbes before going after Anders, Ralph

Anders: “What the hell are you?!”
Darien Fawkes: “I’m Ralph.”
Ralph

Anders: “I shot you!”
Darien Fawkes: “Oh, no no no no no no no no, you missed me.”
Ralph

“Ralph stop! He’s not a monster, he’s a man.”
Jessica Semplar to Darien Fawkes/Ralph, Ralph

Darien Fawkes/Ralph: “I was kinda hoping you’d come by.”
Jessica Semplar: “Look, Ralph, I’ve been thinking. I’m going in the third grade this year, and I’m gonna have a lot of homework.And Dr. Fran said that… And Sarah Hazel’s mom called my mom ’cause she heard about what happened and all, and I talked to Sarah, and she’s gonna come over, and she’s gonna bring Lori Naddleberg, and we’re gonna play Hungry, Hungry Hippos. And, I think I’m gonna give you the key, so you can get in by yourself. Is that OK?”
Darien Fawkes/Ralph: “Yeah. Yeah, it sounds like a very grown up thing to do.”
Jessica Semplar: “I mean, I’m sure you’ll find another kid to play with. You’re really fun, trust me.”
Darien Fawkes/Ralph: “I trust you.”
*Jessica Semplar unlocks Ralph’s ‘door’ and then hands him the key*
Jessica Semplar: “Bye Ralph.”
Darien Fawkes/Ralph: “Bye Jessica.
Jessica Semplar: “OK, you can go in now.”
*Darien Fawkes quicksilvers and then Jessica Semplar walks away near tears*
Ralph

Darien Fawkes: “Doctor Jekyll.”
The Keeper: “Mr. Hyde. Feeling better?”
Darien Fawkes: “Yeah, thank you for the jacket.”
The Keeper: “For what it’s worth, the uh, the Official said to tell Fawkes ‘Way to be gung ho.’ Did you get to say good bye to her?”
Darien Fawkes: “Other way around.”
Ralph

“To Darien Fawkes, Jessica Semplar would always be ‘the kid’. On the whole it was nothing new, all the women in my life leave me. Difference is, to them I was a man. To her I was magic. How do you say good bye to that?”
Darien Fawkes (voice over), Ralph

“The Scottish philosopher Balfour said that ‘Destiny is the scapegoat that we make responsible for our crimes.’ He’s probably right too. This philosophy, known as determinism, is best summed up by Doris Day with the words ‘Que sera, sera.’ Now, I’m not say she was right. But, if it was between Doris and the Scottish dude, I’d party with her any day.”
Darien Fawkes (voice over), Tiresias

Benjamin Scarborough: “Well, what I’m about to tell you might be pretty difficult to hear.”
Rebecca Annewick: “What is it?”
Benjamin Scarborough: “You sure you want me to go on? It’ll change everything.”
Tiresias

“No one has more respect for a clean balance sheet than me. Our work may be underground, but our accounting is strictly topside.”
The Official to Mr. Quinn, Tiresias

Mr. Quinn: “What about office supplies? Can we talk about that?”
The Official: “Ask away.”
Mr. Quinn: “According to this you spent over nine million dollars last year on.. ‘paper’. How do you account for that?”
The Official: “We use a lot of Post-It Notes.”
Mr. Quinn: “‘Post-it Notes’?”
The Official: “Sticky stuff.”
Tiresias

Mr. Quinn: “This might sound like an odd question, what exactly does your agency do?”
The Official: “We protect the liberty and the welfare of the American people.”
Tiresias

“If there’s anything you need, anything at all, we can help.”
The Official to Mr. Quinn, Tiresias

The Keeper: “What brings you here?”
Darien Fawkes: “What else? I need a shot.”
Tiresias

Darien Fawkes: “Look I’m telling you, this, this this thing that they put inside my head, I, I think it’s evil and I think it’s trying to take over.”
The Keeper: “It’s a bio-synthetic gland. It’s not evil.”
Darien Fawkes: “Would it be possible for you to look at me while we’re talking?”
Tiresias

The Keeper: “The gland secretes the quicksilver that makes you invisible. But it also spikes your ephrinephral and..”
Darien Fawkes and The Keeper: “…and norephrinephral levels, which causes the violent behavior.”
Tiresias

“Yeah, well it also turned me into a walking time bomb.”
Darien Fawkes to The Keeper, Tiresias

The Keeper: “It is my job, to keep you safe.”
Darien Fawkes: “That’s a bunch of crap. You care about me like you care about that rat.”
The Keeper: “An.. and what what you think I don’t care about the rat?”
Tiresias

Darien Fawkes: “Ah, he likes you about as much as I do. What’s his name?”
*after the rat bites The Keeper
The Keeper: “LR-23″
Darien Fawkes: “You can’t do better than that?”
The Keeper: “It’s a lab rat.”
Darien Fawkes: “Just like me.”
The Keeper: “Heh, you’re right. There is a resemblance. I’ll call him ‘Darien’.”
Tiresias

“Hey, next time, go for the eyes, huh?”
Darien Fawkes to Darien the Rat, Tiresias

“Hey, you need accountants, call H&R Block.”
Darien Fawkes to The Official, Tiresias

“This is delicious. He cooks the books and we gotta eat it.”
Darien Fawkes to Bobby Hobbes, Tiresias

“Bio-tech glands aren’t exactly cheap you know. Your skull got us into this and you’re gonna get us out.”
The Official to Darien Fawkes, Tiresias

Darien Fawkes: “Did he tell me to ‘shut up’?”
Bobby Hobbes: “Mmhm”
Tiresias

Benjamin Scarborough: “Hmm, you’ve got a lot of secrets.”
Bobby Hobbes: “I’ve got my share.”
Tiresias

Benjamin Scarborough: “Oh, they beat you didn’t they? I see tears.”
Bobby Hobbes: “I got in a few scraps, sure. But it was them crying, not me.”
Tiresias

Benjamin Scarborough: “I see another child. Quite a different child.”
Bobby Hobbes: “Yeah?”
Benjamin Scarborough: “This one intelligent, strong.”
Bobby Hobbes: “That’s it.”
Benjamin Scarborough: “Brave.”
Bobby Hobbes: “That’s me right there.”
Benjamin Scarborough: “Boy of great potential.”
Bobby Hobbes: “Thank you.”
Benjamin Scarborough: “But potential unfulfilled because he always took the easy path. A good soul lost to bad paths.”
Bobby Hobbes: “That’s a judgment call. Stick to the facts old man, all right?”
Benjamin Scarborough: “This boy is now a man. He’s been possessed by an evil. He’s tormented by nightmares. Of killing. Death. He lives in terror of that evil.”
Bobby Hobbes: “Let me ask you something off the record, OK? Me and you. People actually fall for this line of crap?”
Benjamin Scarborough: “Oh I wasn’t talking about you. I was talking about your friend.”
Tiresias

“You have an evil inside you. It’s trying to destroy you. Don’t let it win.”
Benjamin Scarborough to Darien Fawkes, Tiresias

Darien Fawkes: “The guy’s blind and he can see me.”
Bobby Hobbes: “He couldn’t see you. Blind people got real good ears, let me tell you, OK? He could have heard us walk in before, right?”
Darien Fawkes: “OK, but what about what he was saying? I mean, it was like he knew about the quicksilver madness.”
Bobby Hobbes: “Did you hear him say something about a bio-synthetic invisibility gland? No. So you got a little bit of evil in you, that’s all. We all got a little bit of that.”
Darien Fawkes: “Yeah, you’re right.”
Bobby Hobbes: “These people are professional con men. They’re never specific, it’s always general. Everybody has nightmares.”
Darien Fawkes: “You’re right.”
Bobby Hobbes: “Right. And what kid wasn’t forced to wear a dress now and then?”
Tiresias

“Must be tough telling him a joke though. ‘Cause you know, he’d always know.. the punchline right?”
Bobby Hobbes to Benjamin Scarborough’s daughter, Tiresias

“Anyway, he said he never used his ‘gift’ for financial gain. That should’ve been my first clue he was a nutbar.”
Frank DuPree to Darien Fawkes and Bobby Hobbes, Tiresias

Frank DuPree: “What does Tokyo look like?”
*talking to person over headset*
Bobby Hobbes: “I don’t know, I’ve never been there. Did he say something about Tokyo?”
Frank DuPree: “Tokyo?”
Bobby Hobbes: “Have you been to Tokyo?”
Frank DuPree: “Yeah, I’ve been to Tokyo. It’s very nice.”
Tiresias

Darien Fawkes: “Hey, we got something and it’s good.”
Bobby Hobbes: “We think Rebecca Annewick committed suicide.”
The Official: “We already know she committed suicide. You were supposed to find out if she’s murdered.”
Bobby Hobbes: “We think she was murdered.”
The Official: “You said you thought she killed herself.”
Darien Fawkes: “Yeah, we do.”
The Official: “And you guys expect overtime?”
Darien Fawkes: “No, we think she killed herself because someone told her she had to. That’s murder.”
Tiresias

Bobby Hobbes: “So we dig around and we find out about this other guy who saw the same psychic. Turns out the psychic told him to kill himself too.”
The Official: “Did he do it?”
Darien Fawkes: “No, we just talked to the guy.”
Eberts: “Too bad.”
*The Official looks at him*
Eberts: “I thought we had a serial killer. You always said that a serial killer case was very sexy for The Agency.”
Tiresias

The Official: “Well, let’s say this guy can talk people into killing themselves. Does that constitute murder?”
Bobby Hobbes: “Can a voice be a murder weapon?”
Darien Fawkes: “Well, maybe not murder in the first degree. Yeah, but say a doctor lies. Tells the patient they have some kind of terminal illness. Cancer. And then that patient offs themselves. That’s at least man two right there.”
Bobby Hobbes: “Suddenly you’re Perry Mason?”
Tiresias

Darien Fawkes: “Hey, I just caught a serial killer today. What have you done?”
The Keeper: “Sequenced the DNA/RNA structure of the latrodectus mactans, written a paper on the paralyzing effects of the dermis poison in the Australian dart frog and finished my Christmas shopping four months early.”
Darien Fawkes: “Sorry I asked. Can we talk about me getting a fix?”
The Keeper: “Sure. No!”
Tiresias

“You wanna stick that somewhere, I’ll give you some ideas. But it ain’t gonna be in me.”
Darien Fawkes to The Keeper regarding the monitor she’s working on to track his quicksilver madness levels, Tiresias

The Keeper: “Look at the rat. He’s fine.”
Darien Fawkes: “What do you mean he’s fine? He’s a walking Radio Shack.”
Tiresias

Darien Fawkes: “Will you just give me a shot?”
The Keeper: “No, your resistance will build too fast.”
Darien Fawkes: “How do you know that?”
The Keeper: “I finished my experiments.”
Darien Fawkes: “Wait, please tell me that you used a different rat for that.”
The Keeper: “I’m on a tight budget.”
Darien Fawkes: “Boy, she’s really putting you through hell isn’t she buddy? Oh hey! What about that one?”
*Darien points to another rat*
Darien Fawkes: “What’s his name? EZ-286?”
The Keeper: “Hobbes, actually.”
Darien Fawkes: “That’s cute. Well, why not torture Hobbes for a while? I think Darien’s had enough.”
Tiresias

The Keeper: “I’m trying to help you Darien.”
Darien Fawkes: “You wanna help me, give me a shot.”
The Keeper: “Out of the question.”
Tiresias

“Hey, don’t worry about it buddy. I’m bustin’ you out of here.”
Darien Fawkes to Darien the Rat, Tiresias

Benjamin Scarborough: “I’ve been waitin’ for ya.”
Darien Fawkes: “oh yeah? So, whatcha tell Rebecca Annewick?”
Benjamin Scarborough: “Told her what she came to hear, her future.”
Darien Fawkes: “Yeah, you tell her she was gonna blow her brains out in the bathroom? ‘Cause that’s what happened.”
Benjamin Scarborough: “Mmm, Rebecca only did what she had to do to protect her family.”
Darien Fawkes: “And what could hurt them more than what she did?”
Benjamin Scarborough: “A child, shooting, killing his own mother, even by accident, might be considered a greater tragedy.”
Darien Fawkes: “See, you can’t be sure that was gonna happen.”
Benjamin Scarborough: “You can’t be sure it wasn’t.”
Darien Fawkes: “OK. OK, say it’s the truth, OK? That can not be the only way to stop it.”
Benjamin Scarborough: Fate, is a stubborn thing. She asked me how to avoid the prophecy and I told her.”
Darien Fawkes: “Your prophecy’s a crap.”
Benjamin Scarborough: “I think my clients would disagree.”
Darien Fawkes: “Oh, really? Hmm, not Frank Dupree. Yeah, remember Frank? Told him he was gonna kill his family, only way he could avoid it was by killing himself.”
Benjamin Scarborough: “Yes, I did.”
Darien Fawkes: “See, the snag is, uh, he’s still alive and he hasn’t killed anyone so your prophecy was bogus.”
Tiresias

Darien Fawkes: “Hey, you are insane.”
Benjamin Scarborough: “No, it’s you who has the madness. You sweat it from every pore.”
Tiresias

“We wish you’d learn how to knock.”
Eberts to Darien Fawkes after Darien walks into The Official’s office, Tiresias

Darien Fawkes: “I’m gonna kill Hobbes.”
Eberts: “Oh no, what’d he do this time?”
Darien Fawkes: “No, no, y-you don’t understand. I mean I, I’m really gonna kill him. I just… You know what? I, I, I need a new part.. No! I need a new job! I, I can’t be here anymore. Not if he’s gonna be here. I can’t be here! You see what I’m sayin’?”
The Official: “And I thought you two were finally starting to get along.”
Tiresias

“Look, look! Partnership, it’s like a marriage, it’s not always gonna be easy. You need to learn how…”
The Official to Darien Fawkes, Tiresias

Darien Fawkes: “You know what? I, I need, I need the counteragent. Is, is, is The Keeper here?”
The Official: “She’s not here, and you don’t need any.”
Darien Fawkes: “You remember the deal? The deal was that you were gonna keep me sane. Do you remember that?”
The Official: “Yeah. Do your job, that’s the deal.”
Tiresias

Darien Fawkes: “You destroyed my life.”
The Official: “No, no, no, no, no. You destroyed your life. I’m trying to save it.”
Darien Fawkes: “Let me tell you something. I did not ask to be saved.”
The Official: “I put everything I had into you. Every penny I could borrow, pilfer or perforate went into that skull of yours. There’s seventeen million dollars crammed in that brain of yours and you’re still a two bit thief. Couldn’t pull off a simple smash and grab without getting yourself popped. You didn’t deserve to be saved. I should’ve let you stay in prison where you belong.”
Tiresias

The Official: “So, quit whining, finish the job. Prove to me you’re not a punk. Then we’ll talk counteragent.”
Darien Fawkes: “OK, but after this I am gone. You hear me? I don’t work here, anymore.”
The Official: “You have no choice.”
Tiresias

Darien Fawkes: “Who are you?”
Benjamin Scarborough: “Heh heh heh, who do you think I am?”
Darien Fawkes: “I think you’re a crazy old man who believes he’s doin’ good. But you’re killin’ people.”
Benjamin Scarborough: “There was another crazy old man, thought he was doin’ good, his name was Noah. He watched all of humanity perish in a flood. How guilty was he?”
Darien Fawkes: “Even if you can see the future, you’re still killing people. Hate to break it to you Scarborough, but you’re a sick man.”
Benjamin Scarborough: “You really believe that? Or do you just want to?”
Darien Fawkes: “I know it.”
Benjamin Scarborough: “Then why are you even talking to me? Hmm? You’ve got a question you wanna ask. Go ahead, ask me.”
Darien Fawkes: “How did you know about my dream?”
Benjamin Scarborough: “Ours is not to question, but to serve.”
Darien Fawkes: “Hey! You gotta tell me how it ends.”
Tiresias

Bobby Hobbes: “You’re a regular Martha Stewart, aren’tcha? Don’t be shy, what do you got there? What do you got? What does it say? ‘Abe Lincoln..’ Wha, what is that?”
Benjamin Scarborough’s daughter: “‘Let us have faith that right makes right. And in that faith let us to the end, dare to do our duty as we understand it.’”
Tiresias

“The evil in you grows. You fight it, but its strength increases with every beat of your heart.”
Benjamin Scarborough to Darien Fawkes, Tiresias

Bobby Hobbes: “You know, after you torch a place, it’s a good idea to wash your hands. The gasoline smell kind of gives it away, doesn’t it?”
Benjamin Scarborough’s daughter: “He doesn’t know what I did. I thought if the prophecy came true you’d let him go on. He has important work to do.”
Bobby Hobbes: “How many others have you killed?”
Benjamin Scarborough’s daughter: “No one! I swear it. They took their own lives to save the others.”
Tiresias

Darien Fawkes: “Hobbes, he just told me I was gonna go quicksilver mad and kill you.”
Bobby Hobbes: “He’s just trying to (word?) ya. He can’t see the future.”
Darien Fawkes: “How did he know about the fire?”
Bobby Hobbes: “He didn’t. The only reason the prophecy came true is because his daughter torched the place.”
Tiresias

Darien Fawkes: “It’s unbelievable.”
Bobby Hobbes: “Yeah?”
Darien Fawkes: “She’s driving a ’73 Tauroid(?) and I can’t catch her.”
Bobby Hobbes: “Yeah, in the bureau we had four hundred horses, now we’re working with uh, fifteen gerbils here.”
Tiresias

“Hey, I got a prophecy for ya. You want a prophecy? If you don’t shut up you’re gonna find my fist in your mouth.”
Bobby Hobbes to Benjamin Scarborough, Tiresias

Darien Fawkes: “Look, I swear to God, if you don’t shut up, I will kill you.”
Bobby Hobbes: “You tell him.”
Benjamin Scarborough: “It’s not me you’re gonna kill Darien.”
Tiresias

“Let’s just speed things up a little bit.”
Bobby Hobbes before shooting out one of Benjamin Scarborough’s daughter’s tires, Tiresias

Benjamin Scarborough: “You’ve got to stop yourself before you kill anyone else.”
Darien Fawkes: “What are you talking about? ‘Anyone else’? I never killed anyone.”
Benjamin Scarborough: “As a boy, you broke into a neighbor’s house.”
Darien Fawkes: “Yeah, the Mitchell’s. So what?”
Benjamin Scarborough: “What happened to Mrs. Mitchell?”
Darien Fawkes: “Well, five years later Mr. Mitchell shot her for screwing the gardener. It had nothing to do with me.”
Benjamin Scarborough: “It did. He bought the gun because you broke into his house.”
Tiresias

“Don’t let the evil win. Be strong. You can still beat it, but there’s not much time. Pick up the gun. You know what you have to do. Save Hobbes. Free yourself.”
Benjamin Scarborough to Darien Fawkes, Tiresias

Guy: “Hey! Get your hands off her or I’ll call a cop!”
Bobby Hobbes: “Yeah? I am a cop. This woman’s wanted for multiple homicides. Now get out of here. C’mon!”"
Guy: “Sorry.”
Tiresias

“Fawkes! Fawkes, put the gun down! Put it down, put it down! You do not want to be handling a firearm at this particular point in time. Put it down!”
Bobby Hobbes to a quicksilver mad Darien Fawkes, Tiresias

“Fat bastard better give me a calling card after this.”
Bobby Hobbes while searching through his pockets for change to use a payphone to call The Keeper, Tiresias

“You listen to me! I’m a special agent in a life and death situation. Get me The Keeper or I will find you and I swear I will kill you.”
Bobby Hobbes to operator at Fish and Game, Tiresias

Bobby Hobbes: “Don’t let it control you Fawkes! You can beat it!”
*Darien unquicksilvers*
Bobby Hobbes: “Heeey! You see? I told you you could beat it and you beat it. You didn’t need no counteragent.”
Darien Fawkes: “Oh, I didn’t beat it.”
Bobby Hobbes: “What are you talking about?”
Darien Fawkes: “Well, someone has to die, guess it’s gonna have to be you.”
Tiresias

The Keeper: “When my rats went mad, I was worried about Darien. So, I drove out here.”
Bobby Hobbes: “Yeah, well, I appreciate the gesture but I didn’t really, didn’t need your help. I was doing just fine.”
Tiresias

“That’s the last time I offer you a donut.”
Bobby Hobbes to Darien Fawkes, Tiresias

Darien Fawkes: “Why a snake?”
The Keeper: “It just seemed to fit somehow. Looks like an ordinary tattoo, but when you reach quicksilver madness the sections of the snake turn from green to red.”
Darien Fawkes: “What happened to the rat?”
The Keeper: “Built up a resistance to the counteragent, as I knew it would.”
Darien Fawkes: “How long until that happens to me?”
The Keeper: “Got a monitor now, you’re going to be fine.”
Darien Fawkes: “That wasn’t me out there, trying to kill Hobbes. It took over. That happens again I don’t want the counteragent, I want a bullet.”
Tiresias

*Darien picks up the cage with the lab rat in it*
The Keeper: “Hey! What are you doing with that?”
Darien Fawkes: “You already got one lab rat, I don’t think you need another.”
Tiresias

Darien Fawkes: “I know it may be hard to understand, but what Rebecca did, she did out of love. She didn’t think she had any choice.”
Mr. Quinn: “Well, at least now I know the truth.”
The Official: “And a dangerous man and woman are where they belong. Eberts.”
Eberts: “Here are those numbers you requested.”
Mr. Quinn: “That’s fine. Whatever you’re spending, the taxpayers are getting more than their moneys worth.”
The Official: “You know, beginning to think he may be right.”
Bobby Hobbes: “Which, uh, reminds me of a small issue of a calling card I wanted to discuss with you sir.”
Eberts: “I’m sorry sir, don’t you have a meeting to attend?”
The Official: “Oh right, the senator, right. Thank you Eberts.”
Tiresias

Bobby Hobbes: “Can you believe that? Catch a deranged serial killer, and what do we got? Bupkiss.”
Darien Fawkes: “Oh, you really think he was a deranged serial killer?”
Bobby Hobbes: “Of course he was.”
Darien Fawkes: “Lucky you.”
Tiresias

Darien Fawkes: “Hey, sorry about trying to kill you, huh?”
Bobby Hobbes: “Come on, you didn’t come close. Takes a lot more than that to take down Bobby Hobbes my friend.”
Darien Fawkes: “Lucky me, right?”
Tiresias

Benjamin Scarborough: “I was hoping you’d come visit me.”
Darien Fawkes: “Yeah, sure you were.”
Benjamin Scarborough: “I felt badly having to tell you about what happened to your neighbor. But I had to make you see the truth.”
Darien Fawkes: “Nah, no you were just screwing with my head. I got other people doing that. Believe me, you don’t even play in their league.”
Benjamin Scarborough: “So you deny the connection.”
Darien Fawkes: “Somebody once told me that uh, if a stop light turns red before you can cross, your life changes forever. I’ll buy that it changes, but just ’til the next morning, then it’s a whole new deal.”
Benjamin Scarborough: “So you don’t believe in my gifts anymore.”
Darien Fawkes: “Hell no. You were wrong old man, I didn’t kill Hobbes.”
Benjamin Scarborough: “Not yet you haven’t. Not yet.”
Tiresias

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